Motivations

My motivations wax and wane as many times as the day is long. I get so discouraged, so sad and down on myself- this sadness and discouragement leads me right back to my binges. It is a vicious cycle I long to break and never return to. I have been reading so many blogs today, so many thoughts and words and points of view, just to remember- remind myself- that no matter how often I feel otherwise, I AM NOT ALONE. We are, all of us here, going through some sort of struggle- for some it is a struggle to lose weight, for others it's something else, just as difficult, daunting, seemingly impossible at times. We all need a helping hand, a kind word, a push forward, a motivating speech. To that end, I give you this, go to his page, read his words, then read the rest of his blog, as I did today. What wonderful, sincere, motivating words:

There's Something I Need to Tell You (Jack Sh*t, Getting' Fit)

Going back to the way things were simply isn’t an option.

Indeed

Week 1: -8.6

This is how to do it. This is how to stick with it! I worked very hard last week, tracked every single morsel of food I ate, tracked every step I walked and every exercise I did- and in one week I lost 8.6lbs. I know, I KNOW, this is just my first week back and that was mostly just water weight. I also know, I KNOW, that I should never expect consistent weight loss at such a high number. Two or three pounds a week, sure, but surely not consistently -8.6lbs! It doesn't matter though, because I did it. I got through one week, and I am now -10lbs since I came back to Weight Watchers. This means just 12 more rounds of -10 and I'll be done. 12 little 10lb steps to walk down. So much more reasonable that thinking about the 120lbs (may as well be a ton) I have to lose! 12 steps down and I'll be at goal. I am so SO looking forward to that. But for now, to the weekly goals...

Goals from last week:

1. Stick with the WW Points+ program and stay within my daily points value. (Success!)
2. FInish C25K Week 2 Day 2 and 3. Start C25K Week 3 Day 1. (Success!)
3. Do weight training at the gym 3x. (Did not do this at all, will have to reassess this goal, maybe start smaller for now)
4. Drink 99oz of water. Keep hydrated. (Success!)

Goals for the week:

1. Stick with the WW Points+ program and stay within my daily points value- now dropped down to 42 per day.
2. Finish C25K Week 3 Day 2 and 3.
3. Mix in some other exercise (stationary bike, elliptical, a class maybe) this week as well.
4. Drink 100oz of water. Keep hydrated.

Ok, go!

Guess who's back, back again?

Kathryn's back, tell a friend. No, really, tell a friend, I need support people!!

What's been going on since I signed in and posted last (other than weight gain :( )? I signed up at Weight Watchers on 1/29- this being the third time I've signed up for it (I'm a repeat offender at starting diets, losing weight, cheating, gaining weight, dropping diets, starting diets, vicious cycle, really)... I started following the new points+ program on and off, and have 'officially' been on it since March 8th. I have to say, I like it, it's going to work for me.

I'm back here because I need support- don't get me wrong, I do get some support at home, but I feel like since I've been attempting to lose this weight for about a decade now, those around me are probably skeptical about whether or not this is going to work out. I know I can do this, I am really committed and have been following the plan and also exercising. I just want this to be the last time I utter these words, I can do this, I am doing this, I will do this.

Here's why I know that I'm definitely getting through to the other side as a thinner, healthier, happier person this time-- I'm an emotional eater, it's what I do. Sad? Food. Lonely? Food. Feeling left out, like I was today? Food. All I want to do when I feel this way, really, is buy food, hide in a movie theater, eat and watch a movie. Yeah, I've actually done that several times. All I wanted to do today when I felt a lonely and left out was think of running into my old habits, forget the fact that I've been doing so well, quit, cheat, and (that old familiar standby) 'start again fresh tomorrow'. But I didn't. One thing I've learned on weight watchers is to plan ahead, decide what I'm going to eat ahead of time, figure out how many points it is, and just fit it into my day- no feeling bad about what I'm eating, because there's no 'cheating', no 'bad foods'. So I did just that! First of all, I refused to revert to my old bad habits. I knew I wanted to have chipotle for dinner, so I just figured out how many points it would be and ate it as a meal- no overeating, just dinner.

*Here's how I figured out the nutritional facts in the food I had at chipotle (and used those to calculate the points+):
- Chipotle nutrition information calculator
- Subway nutrition information calculator

*In addition to following the WW Points+ program, I've been doing the Couch to 5K program. Right now I've completed all of Week 1 and Week 2 Day 1. I don't really like running right now, but since it's a combination of walking and running, I've actually been ok with doing it. I know the more I do the easier it get's and that's pretty great motivation itself.

Goals for the week:

1. Stick with the WW Points+ program and stay within my daily points value.
2. FInish C25K Week 2 Day 2 and 3. Start C25K Week 3 Day 1.
3. Do weight training at the gym 3x.
4. Drink 99oz of water. Keep hydrated.

Yeah, I'm back. :)